Learning to say no

Yesterday an event transpired which encapsulates much of what I have learned thus far in my brief time in India. We were walking along the water's edge near the Taj Mahal hotel when a man approached me with great vigor. He proceeded to grab me by the ear, stick a metal pick in my ear canal, and extract its (shamefully plentiful) contents. "I am expert," he said, and showed me his card, which attested to his 25 years' experience in ear canal health. Before I could say a word, the pick was back in, with my ear lobe again pressed between his fingers. "Please, no thanks," I said, as I tried to pull away, which only increased the tension on my ear. "NO," I said and pulled away again, to further protest from this man, until finally, "NO!!". I pulled away, and out popped my ear as I took Rachel quickly away. From behind, I could hear (better now from my right ear, I'll admit) the gentlemen say "you pay 60 rupees now."

What is so illustrative about this event? In Mumbai at least, the traveller is accosted on all sides by people trying to sell them something, or to get something from them. Taxi drivers, pitiful beggars barefoot and rag covered, shopkeepers, restaurant owners, all are vying for your money. This is particularly bad in tourist areas, where the aforementioned incident took place. Once a potential suitor has been engaged with eye or verbal contact, a casual "no thanks" will not suffice for peace, nor will a forceful "NO"; it takes a determined "NO!" (or "naheen naheen" if using Hindi) and a brisk head-downturned walk away to be left in peace. The art of saying "NO" is one which I have not mastered yet, but it is an art that I am improving with each passing day.

What is unfortunate about this state of affairs is that one learns to be guarded when approached by strangers, on the assumption that they want money. We have had many pleasant interactions with strangers who wanted nothing more than to offer helpful advice, or to hear about our lives back in New York, or what we thought about OBAMA. But when we approach the encounter prepared to say "NO," it leaves a bad taste in the mouth to never have to say the word at all.